family

Today has definitely proved to be interesting.  Some reactions will always be there no matter how long it has been.  Well you know what some things don't change but some things do.  Instead of drawing into myself and for the most part burying my anxiety I walked straight to my Family and said, "I need you," and they were there almost before I could finish speaking.  Most people would assume that using that phrase would come naturally due to my disability and they would be partially correct.Asking for physical help hasn't been a problem for me for a very long time because of the situations of my life puts me into.  Because of my physical vulnerability the older I become the more I attempt to hide chinks in my emotional armor because I'm already  viewed as physically weak I don't need people thinking I fall to pieces.  Sometimes it's nice not to have to be okay. Thank you does not even begin to cover it.

On bended knee,
Silver

resoultion

It has been cold and rainy all day.  I thought I would have to deal with my ex-girlfriend soon but apparently the forces of the universe are being merciful.  Be that as it may I been given rules by which I am to handle  things the next time I to be around her.I am very glad to have these rules because they keep me from being put into a corner I can't get out of.  I will not cower for anyone anymore, least of all her.  What will be interesting is her reaction to the fact that I  call someone Master now.   As a friend recently said, they will be fireworks and they will not be pretty. At least she will try to make it that way she will most likely try to make me feel incompetent or stupid. I will give her one chance to apologize and back down, if she continues to berate me I will make one phone call and wash my hands of the whole thing. She will out I'm not joking, and if she thinks she's big enough to face Him I wish her luck, she's toast, She's also going to find her welcome worn to breaking point I will toss her on her ear if He doesn't No one disrespects my Family
On bended knee,
Silver

watched over

Short entry, this being looked after deal is nice.
On bended knee,
Silver

of collars and Photoshop

I got an e-mail from the leather worker last night telling me that they couldn't open the image file that I sent with the picture of the dragon that is supposed to be engraved into my collar.  It took three people to successfully change the file format into something they would be able to open.  I have had Adobe Photoshop on my computer for the better part of a year and trying to send this emblem to them was my first practical lesson with it, who knew? It is indeed a new world.
On bended knee,
Silver

A Whole New World

So my Mom shaved her head before the chemo could take the last of it.  My mom is officially a statistic now. The world will always be different then it has been for the first 24 years of my life.  I'm also starting a new portion of my life as well. I have lived on the fringes of the BDSM community for years, learning what I could.  I eventually had the title of "informed vanilla wafer" among friends in the community. I bent knee and bared throat to no one and while I've been polite my answer has been a very firm "no thank you" when asked if I had any inclination to serve for the past six years. Fast forward to last month. Into my life comes this Man and I have this unmistakable compulsion  to kneel before a person I just met in the manner of a 12th century vassal. I had just met him. As soon as I got over being afraid of him, we talked, and talked and talked some more.  The more we talked the stronger that being has become.  I have done a lot of thinking and have come to the conclusion that if he ever asked I would happily sit at his feet for long he told me to or just about anything else that was physically within my capabilities to do  I don't understand it but  I have learned in my life that sometimes you don't need to understand  why something makes you happy only that it does. I know some things but I also know that there is a world of things I don't.when my caller is done I will wear it with pride to the person who chose to give it to me and pride in the person He believes I can be and because he believes it  the person I will do my best to become.  And I don't know where this road will take me but I have solid ground under my feet now and even if the road I walk is unfamiliar I am not alone. 
I write on bended knee with bared throat to the One who did not seek me but welcomed me with open arms nonetheless when I came to Him.