So my Mom shaved her head before the chemo could take the last of it. My mom is officially a statistic now. The world will always be different then it has been for the first 24 years of my life. I'm also starting a new portion of my life as well. I have lived on the fringes of the BDSM community for years, learning what I could. I eventually had the title of "informed vanilla wafer" among friends in the community. I bent knee and bared throat to no one and while I've been polite my answer has been a very firm "no thank you" when asked if I had any inclination to serve for the past six years. Fast forward to last month. Into my life comes this Man and I have this unmistakable compulsion to kneel before a person I just met in the manner of a 12th century vassal. I had just met him. As soon as I got over being afraid of him, we talked, and talked and talked some more. The more we talked the stronger that being has become. I have done a lot of thinking and have come to the conclusion that if he ever asked I would happily sit at his feet for long he told me to or just about anything else that was physically within my capabilities to do I don't understand it but I have learned in my life that sometimes you don't need to understand why something makes you happy only that it does. I know some things but I also know that there is a world of things I don't.when my caller is done I will wear it with pride to the person who chose to give it to me and pride in the person He believes I can be and because he believes it the person I will do my best to become. And I don't know where this road will take me but I have solid ground under my feet now and even if the road I walk is unfamiliar I am not alone.
I write on bended knee with bared throat to the One who did not seek me but welcomed me with open arms nonetheless when I came to Him.
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